Teacher

How can you teach me Poetry

is your rhyme book more metaphorically mature

did your ink pour from the heavens like salt water to sweet scented lilies

does the time you spent tap dancing to life take away from my ballet of being

How can you teach me poetry when Poetry is the teacher itself

You like me…but a student

Sitting in the lecture hall of emotion

Listening to mother Teresa’s heartbeat through the stethoscope of empathy

Learning about one’s self as though it were a separate being

like the sun painting a self portrait on the canvas of tomorrow

I rise to write

I sleep to dream the words written, the message manifested

You cannot teach me how to breathe

you cannot teach me poetry,

except through poetry itself.

Judged

Think I’d feel less judged in a courtroom:

These last few months have been so challenging, on so many different levels. I am a very verbal person, but that does not mean everyone wants to hear what I have to say….thats lesson one.

Lesson two, some elders will never respect you, regardless of how smart/capable you are…to them you are young and unable to disseminate anything intellectual, these folks are closed-minded, ignore their ways and save your energy.

Lesson three, just breathe, if you are stressed out dont vent to someone who will only adopt the stress and not provide relief/support…because if you do you’ll just add 1 more person to the stress.

Lesson four, this too shall pass. Don’t make permanent choices for temporary situations

Lesson five, you too have things to learn, so be open, but dont just swallow all that’s being fed, find out the why behind what is being taught. It makes you a better a student and a better teacher down the line.

Ive learned a lot more but Ill leave it at that for now. I hope 2012 proves to be a year of great promise, 2011 has brought me great things (greatest of all my son Alhamdulillah). However it was a highly emotional/hormonally imbalanced year too. God willing 2012 proves to be better.

Still I Rise- Maya Angelou

You may write me down in history

With your bitter, twisted lies,

You may trod me in the very dirt

But still, like dust, I’ll rise.

Does my sassiness upset you?

Why are you beset with gloom?

‘Cause I walk like I’ve got oil wells

Pumping in my living room.

Just like moons and like suns,

With the certainty of tides,

Just like hopes springing high,

Still I’ll rise.

Did you want to see me broken?

Bowed head and lowered eyes?

Shoulders falling down like teardrops,

Weakened by my soulful cries?

Does my haughtiness offend you?

Don’t you take it awful hard

‘Cause I laugh like I’ve got gold mines

Diggin’ in my own backyard.

You may shoot me with your words,

You may cut me with your eyes,

You may kill me with your hatefulness,

But still, like air, I’ll rise.

Does my sexiness upset you?

Does it come as a surprise

That I dance like I’ve got diamonds

At the meeting of my thighs?

Out of the huts of history’s shame

I rise

Up from a past that’s rooted in pain

I rise

I’m a black ocean, leaping and wide,

Welling and swelling I bear in the tide.

Leaving behind nights of terror and fear

I rise

Into a daybreak that’s wondrously clear

I rise

Bringing the gifts that my ancestors gave,

I am the dream and the hope of the slave.

I rise

I rise

I rise.

Utterly In Love

The birth of my son took place on November 1st, 2011. I was in labor for over 24 hours. I never would have guessed that my baby would have arrived approximately 11 days before his due date, nor could I have ever imagined the pain involved with labor…..but really of all things, I never understood love in such a pure and honest way as I do now. Thank God for that.

I am utterly in love with my son. He is absolutely mesmerizing. I pray to be the best mother I can possibly be for him and any future babies. I pray he will grow into a good, intelligent, and strong person. I am just so grateful.

There is so much satisfaction in simply enjoying the sight of him….finally my little guy is here, and I have never been happier <3

Waiting

Let love usher you in

let strength push the storm clouds afar

let patience pull forth the bloom

let inspiration surround us with success

let honor keep us protected

let authenticity preserve our character

let peace make our mind and heart its home

let knowledge seek and find us

let poetry write itself on our skin

let beauty be what we are

let the world be better because of us

and when my hourglass has reached its limit

Let love usher me out

Persist

Do not let people dissuade you. if you have a dream believe in it, others may not, but your dream coming true is not dependent on the belief of others…however, if you lose belief or faith in your own dream/s then what chance for survival have they?

Some may look at you and your endeavors through the eyes of doubt, they may think you are overly ambitious….its your job to prove them wrong, show them you’re not overly ambitious, YOU ARE DRIVEN.

Challenge yourself daily in a productive manner, whether you win or lose in that challenge you’ll come out being a little more experienced and therefore strengthened just for trying.

The sun may not be visible in the midst of a  stormy sky, nevertheless it shines. You may not hear the birds singing through the noise of city traffic, nevertheless they are singing.  

Have faith in yourself, be persistent, be resilient. Hear the criticisms of others but only listen to your heart….at the end of the day that’s the message you’ll have to live with anyways.

The Flame

I played with fire as a youth

held its flame in the palm of my plump hand

wanting to feel something, anything, besides the burn of not belonging

I kept a clear red lighter in my pocket, lit the love letters from myself to myself

bathed in the ashes and stared at my soot covered dreams lying on the floor

There came a time when the fire took the form of a torch

and I carried it proud, cremating the Icarus that once lived within me

incinerating the doubts and self destructive habits

enlightened and invigorated, I burn brighter than ever

Now, I light your candle with the very flame

that once almost consumed me

 I watch you flicker in the wind, watch you grow in the still

feel the warmth of your energy, see you glow in the night

like a precious tear rising from the eye of a candle, your flame burns beautifully

and I cant help but love it

and I cant help but love you

life has so much to teach you, this fire you’ll have to learn how to tame

just shine on, dear son, shine on

and you will see the way.

Wings

I saw an Angel walk barefoot across a bed of hot coals

a test of strength to the spirit and soles

“why such self-sacrifice” I asked second guessing,

“to remind myself why these wings are a blessing”.

 

Lost

Tried flying with the wings on your back

but I

couldn’t taste freedom when I kissed the sky

 

Hurricane Irene

NYC will  have to endure the wrath of Hurricane Irene tomorrow, just half an hour left until its Saturday August 28, 2011. I’m slightly intimidated, a little exited, but generally I just want this to pass already.

The days been calm, muggy, rainy. The markets were busy with people but not as much as on Friday when the first announcements of Irenes severity hit the city. Now I’m just sitting at my laptop wondering what to do. I put water away in the fridge, washed all the fruits and vegetables just in case the water gets contaminated. Wishing we got some C batteries for the radio though *sigh*.

Thank goodness we’re not in an evacuation zone, however one cannot predict just how the storm is going to effect us here. The MTA has been shut down since noon and it wont be working tomorrow, Mayor Bloomberg actually stated that depending on how bad Irene hits the MTA may not be back in effect till after Monday.

I kinda feel like my generation was born into one great storm. We’ve had to deal with so much being a part of the net-generation I feel like we’re alone in a sense…..anyways, I’m going to try and take some pictures before Irene this the neighborhood, lets hope the after pics aren’t devastating.

Best of luck to us all <3